Flight Damage

Hubby took care of all the arrangements for our trip back to Chicago to visit family. He cashed in the chips for flights, hotels, car rental and limo to the airport.

But he forgot to mention a slight detail; food is no longer served on flights. So when he informed me of this fact, I panicked!

Ok, airport food it is.  We get through security and arrive at the gate with 15 minutes to spare.  I suggest Hubby board first and save us overhead compartment space. I park the kids and run to the Starbucks to buy sandwiches and bottled water.

The line was moving quickly. I figured I had 5 minutes to grab, pay and go. That is until “Miss Professional Complainer” stepped up to the counter.

“Um… I’ll have a this and that and ok that too. No wait, I don’t want you charging me for this one as you guys owe me.” The Starbucks crew of three looks befuddled and all manner of movement comes to a dead stop. FOR 4 MINUTES. And then it takes her another 4 minutes putting it all in her large bag! The entire line is rolling their eyes and doing the impatient dance.

I stand firm, knowing Hubby is not going to let the plane take off without us.

The line moves at a snails pace as the orders become complicated a la “too much choice” menu and time slips away. I abandon the line knowing I can buy (and at even higher prices) snacks on the plane and race to the kids. The line is empty, the passengers all on board and I think, cool, we just swipe and go.

But the Professional Complainer steps up right in front of us! And she now goes into her spiel with the ticket taker.

“You guys owe me an upgrade to business class. I missed a huge important party and well it was really important and you guys owe me an upgrade. I talked to the guy at the counter, but he didn't get how I missed this really important party. So you need to give me an upgrade.”

The ticket taker smiled her “valium smile” and waved PC on down the jetway to the airplane. We swiped passed the woman and smiled the “knowing smile.”

We are the next to last passengers down the jetway and I have "where are u?"texts buzzing my cell phone from Hubby.

Professional Complainer is now on the plane at the entrance giving her you-owe-me spiel to the greeting attendant. It lasts another 5 minutes while we wait impatiently behind her. She is told, “sorry no seats available in business class.” And the discussion picks up again. AHHHHHH!!!!

By now I am 1) hungry, 2) totally frustrated by this woman’s need to claim her upgrade at the last minute. I am ready to blow past her with a loud “Excusssse meeeee” but am dead stopped by a look from D#1, who is not about to be humiliated by her mother so early on in the trip.

Hubby falls asleep right after take-off so I reach into his pants pocket to grab his wallet. Years of marriage have taught me that once he’s out, he’s out so I continue working my hand down his pocket while the food service attendant looks on with patience.  Guess she has seen it all. I spend $25.00 on ‘snacks’ to make us happy.

We can hear the Professional Complainer, four rows ahead of us, still going on and on to her seatmate about how “they owe me an upgrade. I missed a really important party and well they owe me!”

In listening to her I realized how her speech was incredibily ineffective.  As she got off the plane, she was still letting all airline personnel, "you guys owe me an upgrade 'cause I missed a really important party."

What what is wrong with her spiel?

Happy Time of Year!

Wishing to all a Happy Time of Year made possible by the ability of each of us to find our happiness within ourselves and share it with the world. 

Demise of Print and Barbara Kingsolver

Was lucky enough to secure a ticket to see author extraordinaire Barbara Kingslover.  As we all know Ms. Kingsolver has written much beloved books such as "The Bean Trees," "Poisonwood Bible" and "Animal, Vegetable, Miracle."

Ms Kingsolver was entertaining and well spoken.  She was wonderful at pulling the audience into her daily writing life and the way she creates her novels.  For all budding, frustrated writers her description of her methodology of thinking out an idea, doing research and then committing the story to paper was a road map that hit its mark.   I could hear the muttering from the crowd as we were leaving: "She does research first!", "She is not always in control of her characters," "She loves to edit! She actually CUTS material!"

The audience questions were always bordering on reverence and the need to share how her books had changed their lives.  And one woman asked the key question of the evening:

"When you talk about a reader falling asleep while reading late into the night to last page and then the book, which has fallen on their face, becomes drenched with their tears, how do you feel about the Kindle?"

You could have heard a pin drop.  My seat mate had just showed me her kindle access on her iPhone.  I have written two blogs on the Demise of Print. We held our collective breath to hear the mistress of writing to hold forth on this topic.

"I am for reading in any manner that will allow for the magical world for stories to be read by the largest amount of readers.  What I am concerned about is the monopoly that Amazon created with the Kindle.  With the cost of a book down to $9.99, where is the revenue to support not just successful writers, but budding authors who need the advance to live on while they develop their next project and skill?  Where will the revenue come from to keep your independent book seller in business?"(paraphrased by the way)

I thought of all the wonderful books stores L.A. has lost in the last year.  Dutton's in Brentwood, Dutton's in North Hollywood, Book Soup and Skylight books are merging, and the only independent store left in my neighborhood is a rare book collector dealer with outrageous prices that I cannot afford.

I am as concerned as Ms. Kingsolver on the demise of a system that was perfected and efficient to nuture the budding talent hidden  within the vastness of the US.  Without the support and guidance and FUNDING to improve themselves via one advance after another what will stop the slide into mediocre literature?

My question now goes to Jeff Bezos of Amazon to ask him, how as a publisher, he intends to find, fund and nuture all those writers of passion and talent to continue creating the stories to entertain us.  Because in the end all any of us have that we most value are our stories!

The Rush for Private Schools

We are in the middle of "rushing" for private schools for D#2.  She is touring and viewing, we are calculating the costs and wondering how we will do it.  We will fill out reams of questions on application forms that will tell the administration everything about us short of a DNA map.

I find these "gauntlets" interesting as they are as discriminatory as they can be within an inch of the ethical and morals boundaries. And they all stand proud on their non-discriminatory philosophy. Bah!

Each private school forms it's own "tribes" with a uniform student body. They look for the commonalities that allow them to create insular worlds and for 30K per student per year to cater to the delusions parents have that their child is the next  "Bill Gates."  And if not, at least entrance into a top Ivy League school.

In Los Angeles there are 57, yes that's right 57, private schools that vie for a small percentage of students that qualify for entrance.

The private schools, funded in the past by tons of money from parents, allowed them to "overbuild." Every school had to offer it all in order to compete with each other.

That is exactly what has gotten them into trouble.  57 flavors of schools is NOT sustainable even in a large population center as Los Angeles.  Parents able to pay for a customized education that emphasized their values, morals and delusions about their kids, are rare and far between.

I think the schools are now the ones with delusions!  Offering to "mold" the students into perfect cookie cutters semblances of their parents expectations is ridiculous.  Children are as varied as their parents and only those with the gumption and determination make it in life.

If I am to find the perfect "tribe" for D#2 then I guess I need to look at the commonalities of culture. Wonder where I can find that school, seeped in reality, with a touch of low-cost.  That's my kind of tribe.