"I am a shy person so I am more comfortable listening to others," so said by a speaker I recently heard at an awards show.
What insight! What a great clue to working with people. I have to admit that I get bored very easily talking all the time about my business. Listening to others becomes a pleasurable event when I calm down and open up to what they are saying. I get a sense of what is going on in their lives beyond what their words. This helps me help them.
And if I know anything about the human being is that everyone wants to be heard deeply and sincerely.
And if I know anything about the human being is that everyone wants to be heard deeply and sincerely.
Here are few hints and tips on listening to all others this holiday season.
How to Listen Well
- maintain eye contact;
- don't interrupt the speaker;
- sit still; stand comfortably to you don't weave or move too much;
- nod your head; keep you hand still;
- lean toward the speaker; not too close as too imply intimacy, but enough to hear them clearly
- ask appropriate questions when the speaker has finished.
Things that may get in the way of listening.
- bias or prejudice; do you like this person or not?
- language differences or accents;
- noise;
- worry, fear, or anger, boredom;
- a different agenda for attending the event;
So I ask you, "What is your challenge when listening to others?"
2 comments:
I'd add that a barrier is 'waiting for your turn to talk' being so focused on what you want to get out, that you are not really listening. By listening and genuinely responding you can learn so much. A very small percentage of communication is verbal. You have to be aware with all your senses. Also we might think "I don't have prejudices. I'm open minded." We all do of some sort, it's human nature. We assume we already know what the other person is all about and what they have to say. Ask open-ended questions and follow up on their answers. Don't worry if you're getting off topic. That's when the fun begins.
What Alicia said. Also, it's hard not to multitask. And when I'm sitting still, or listening, the challenge is to seriously - seriously! - shut off my brain so I'm taking in what the person says. So I'm not already formulating a response the second the other person's done. It's a process of growing up. Because being the first one at the table with a response was a good thing when I was younger. Now it just means I'm not really listening.
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