But he forgot to mention a slight detail; food is no longer served on flights. So when he informed me of this fact, I panicked!
Ok, airport food it is. We get through security and arrive at the gate with 15 minutes to spare. I suggest Hubby board first and save us overhead compartment space. I park the kids and run to the Starbucks to buy sandwiches and bottled water.
The line was moving quickly. I figured I had 5 minutes to grab, pay and go. That is until “Miss Professional Complainer” stepped up to the counter.
“Um… I’ll have a this and that and ok that too. No wait, I don’t want you charging me for this one as you guys owe me.” The Starbucks crew of three looks befuddled and all manner of movement comes to a dead stop. FOR 4 MINUTES. And then it takes her another 4 minutes putting it all in her large bag! The entire line is rolling their eyes and doing the impatient dance.
I stand firm, knowing Hubby is not going to let the plane take off without us.
The line moves at a snails pace as the orders become complicated a la “too much choice” menu and time slips away. I abandon the line knowing I can buy (and at even higher prices) snacks on the plane and race to the kids. The line is empty, the passengers all on board and I think, cool, we just swipe and go.
But the Professional Complainer steps up right in front of us! And she now goes into her spiel with the ticket taker.
“You guys owe me an upgrade to business class. I missed a huge important party and well it was really important and you guys owe me an upgrade. I talked to the guy at the counter, but he didn't get how I missed this really important party. So you need to give me an upgrade.”
The ticket taker smiled her “valium smile” and waved PC on down the jetway to the airplane. We swiped passed the woman and smiled the “knowing smile.”
We are the next to last passengers down the jetway and I have "where are u?"texts buzzing my cell phone from Hubby.
Professional Complainer is now on the plane at the entrance giving her you-owe-me spiel to the greeting attendant. It lasts another 5 minutes while we wait impatiently behind her. She is told, “sorry no seats available in business class.” And the discussion picks up again. AHHHHHH!!!!
By now I am 1) hungry, 2) totally frustrated by this woman’s need to claim her upgrade at the last minute. I am ready to blow past her with a loud “Excusssse meeeee” but am dead stopped by a look from D#1, who is not about to be humiliated by her mother so early on in the trip.
Hubby falls asleep right after take-off so I reach into his pants pocket to grab his wallet. Years of marriage have taught me that once he’s out, he’s out so I continue working my hand down his pocket while the food service attendant looks on with patience. Guess she has seen it all. I spend $25.00 on ‘snacks’ to make us happy.
We can hear the Professional Complainer, four rows ahead of us, still going on and on to her seatmate about how “they owe me an upgrade. I missed a really important party and well they owe me!”
In listening to her I realized how her speech was incredibily ineffective. As she got off the plane, she was still letting all airline personnel, "you guys owe me an upgrade 'cause I missed a really important party."
What what is wrong with her spiel?
3 comments:
What's wrong? She couldn't buy you your snack and complain about that as well!!
Seeking attention is not the course of action to take. Reputations precede people.
verrrry cool blog. I would like my picture up on it.
William Shatner
very astute comments. I'm a huge fan of your work. Pls include my on all ur updates!
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